Girl came from school and started asking, "Mom, how did the human race came on earth?"

 

The religious mother explained, "God made stupid  Adam and beautiful Eve, they loved each other, Grandma Eve produced beautiful  children which became human race on earth."

 

Dad came from office and Girl rushed to him and  asked, "Dad, do you know how the human race came on  earth?"

Swarg ke dwar pe 3 log khade the....

 

God : Sirf 1 hi andar ja sakta hai....

 

1st : Main mandir ka pujari hu, sari umar aapki seva ki hai. 

 

Swarg pe mera hak hai....

 

Bhagwan Kuch Nahi bole

 

2nd : Main Doctor hu, sari umar logo ki seva ki hai. 

A trucker who has been out on the road for three weeks stops into a brothel outside Vegas. 

 

He walks straight up to the Madam, drops down $500 and says,

 

"I want your ugliest woman and a bologna sandwich!!!"

 

The Madam is astonished. "But sir, for that kind of money you could have one of my finest ladies and a three-course meal."

 

The trucker replies, "Listen sweetheart, I ain't horny, I'm homesick."

 

I stopped at a florist shop after work to pick up roses for my wife.

 

As the clerk was putting the finishing touches on the bouquet, a youngman burst through the door, breathlessly requesting a dozen red roses.

 

"I'm sorry," the clerk said. "This man just ordered our last bunch."

 

The desperate customer turned to me and begged, "May I please have those roses?"

A famous speaker said: “The best years of my life were spent in the arms of a beautiful woman who wasn’t my wife!”

 

Audience was shocked. 

 

The speaker added: “that woman was my mother!” (Laughter and Applause)

 

A listener tried it at his home. 

I am sure that the taxi cab driver learnt that it pays to keep your mouth shut is some situations... :D

 

A woman and her ten-year-old son were riding in a taxi in Montreal.

 

It was raining and all the prostitutes were standing under the awnings. 

 

"Mom" said the boy "what are all those women doing?" 

The year is 2222 and Mike and Maureen land on Mars after accumulating enough frequent flier miles. 

 

They meet a Martian couple and are talking about all sorts of things. Mike asks if Mars has a stock market, if they have laptop computers, how they make money, etc. Finally, Maureen brings up the subject of s_e_x.

 

"Just how do you guys do it?” asks Maureen.

 

“Pretty much the way you do,” responds the Martian.

Once upon a time. There was just one cinema theatre in the Village.

 

In fact as a Cinema screen, the owner of the theatre, had installed a khaadi dhoti.

 

The villagers were very happy with the idea of a Khaadi Dhoti screen.

 

They decided to dedicate the theatre to Bapuji, and named the theatre: "BAPU KEE DHOTI"

 

Some of the Up coming films/attractions at "BAPU KEE DHOTI" cinema hall,

When Aishwarrya delivered a baby girl,

 

The doctor welcomed the baby,

 

"You will be amazed to know which family you are born in.

A Dad buys a lie detector robot that slaps people when they lie.

 

He decides to test it at dinner.

 

"Son, where were you today?"